It’s a scene Warren County Sheriff Martin Pace says is the most miserable part of his job — having to walk up to the front door of a home to tell the people inside that a family member has died in an accident. It’s particularly painful when the death is due to underage drinking.

“Being in law enforcement gives me a front-row seat to life,” he told a group of parents at St. Aloysius High School. “The uncut version. It can be an absolutely wonderful experience, but it has also given me memories that no one should ever have. If I never, ever deliver another death message it would be great, but that won’t happen. Please make sure it’s not your door that I’m knocking on.”

In a step Pace hailed as new and realistic, St. Aloysius administrators are requiring parents of ninth- through 12th-graders to attend one of four information sessions on teens and drinking. If at least one parent does not attend a meeting, a student will be barred from the homecoming dance in two weeks or prom next spring.

Two meetings have already been held. Parents who’ve missed them have two more chances to satisfy the requirement, which will be good for the child’s entire four years at St. Al. Both upcoming meetings will be Thursday — one at noon and the other at 6 p.m. — in the parochial school gym.

The sessions feature advice on how to talk to your child about drinking, a video about the pervasiveness of drinking and the easy availability of alcohol in modern American society and a series of guest speakers, including Pace, each with a short message for parents. Each parent also receives a packet of information with brochures from police and sheriff’s departments, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, Vicksburg’s Make a Promise Coalition and other organizations.

“We’ve done lots of parent education on this issue but this is the first time we’re requiring parents to attend,” said Jennifer Henry, chief administrator for Vicksburg Catholic School, which includes grades K-12. “Parent education is the key. Yes, we have to educate students but we have to talk to the parents, too. Often they are giving the kids alcohol at home, thinking it’s OK as long as it’s supervised. We must tell parents that it’s not helping these kids and it’s against the law. It’s not OK to have them drink at home.”

“I really didn’t want to come,” said Cynthia Montalbano, whose daughter is an 11th-grader at St. Al. She also has a 25-year-old son who graduated from Vicksburg High School in 2001. “I’ve been out of town. I was tired. I thought, ‘What can I learn?’ But now I wish my husband had been here, too. I really want to tell him what Martin Pace said.”

Randy McAlpin, parent of a 10th-grader, said his perception of underage drinking had changed because of the meeting, especially hearing Pace’s message. “Maybe not tonight, but I will talk to her,” he said of his daughter.

Montalbano was standing with St. Al’s dean of students, teacher and coach Mike Jones. As the father of an eighth-grader, Jones did not have to be at the meeting. “I’m here because I’m dealing with the kids. People feel like the school is telling them how to parent, but sometimes it needs to be done, and when it’s your child we’re talking about, I don’t think it hurts to have someone tell you even if you think you don’t need it.”

An anonymous poll taken at St. Al revealed that 37 percent of students between sixth and ninth grades have already consumed beer, 30 percent some other type of alcohol and 15 percent wine coolers, St. Al principal Michele Townsend told the parents. About 10 percent — 22 out of 230 students polled — said they can get alcohol if they want it. Seventeen said that alcohol is “frequently available,” and 32 said it is “sometimes available.”

Survey statistics show that about two-thirds of underage drinkers get their alcohol from parents, Townsend said.

“It’s a sad reality that grown men and women would have to have law enforcement tell them not to let children drink on their property,” Pace said.

Patty Mekus, who has worked with United Way, the Make a Promise Coalition and What Up Wit Dat, organizations that work to combat underage drinking and drug use, has been one of the featured speakers. One of her goals, she said, is to educate parents on the legalities involved in providing alcohol to underage drinkers, a role fostered by the group, Parents Who Host Lose the Most.

“You cannot give alcohol to your teen or to your teen’s friends, even with their parents’ permission,” she said. If caught, adults face a maximum fine of $1,000 for a first offense and $2,000 and up to a year in jail for a second offense, she said. “And you can be civilly liable if you know they’ve been drinking and you let them leave, especially if something tragic happens.”

Other speakers have included Robert Foley of River Region Medical Center, Sgt. Jackie Johnson of the Vicksburg Police Department, a representative from Grace Christian Counseling Center and Vickie Free, who talked about losing her 18-year-old son, Bobby Hilbun, to an accidental overdose of legal prescription drugs last year.

“If you get nothing else out of this,” Free told the parents, “I implore you, don’t ever think, ‘My child would not do this.’”

Vicksburg Warren School District Superintendent Dr. James Price said that in addition to underage drinking he sees an increasing problem with students pilfering prescription drugs from the medicine cabinets of parents, grandparents and other family members. He and the schools’ resource officer will be looking at St. Al’s new policy requiring parents to attend the information session to see if it can be adapted to the needs of the public schools.

“We do not have a policy like that, but Michele Townsend sent us a letter a week ago, inviting us to attend one of the four meetings to see what it’s like,” Price said. “It seems like a great program. One of our concerns, though, is that some of the parents may not be able to attend a meeting even though they may wish to.”

That is a concern that St. Al students share.

“I don’t think it’s right that if the parent doesn’t attend, kids can’t go to homecoming,” said Rachel Thomas, a St. Al junior who will be 17 in two weeks. “A lot of my friends said their parents don’t want to go. It’s hard for some others because of the hours they’re at work.”

Rachel said she attended the prom last year, and went to the homecoming dance both her freshman and sophomore years. She has not seen as much evidence of teen drinking before or during school dances as she has at dances hosted by other city organizations and social clubs and at private parties. “A lot of my friends do drink,” she said. “Mostly beer. That’s the easiest thing for them to get.  Either gas stations just sell it to them or they have fake I.D.s.”

Johnson, the Vicksburg police sergeant, said the department has a “party buster hotline” parents can call to have police check for alcohol consumption at teen parties — 601-636-3507.

For St. Aloysius, the program has to include “reactive” policy as well as “proactive,” Townsend told the parents. Students who are allowed to attend the homecoming dance will be subject to random saliva-strip testing for alcohol, and if they are caught drinking, “We’ll follow the policy as outlined in the diocesan handbook and parent/student handbook,” she said. Actions range from parent notification and required substance-abuse counseling to expulsion. “The policy does not stress punishment,” the handbook states. “Rather, it is implemented to promote healthy, responsible living and enable early detection and intervention by families and school administrators.”